Posts Tagged ‘DBT’
Tolerate Distress with A-C-C-E-P-T-S
“The truth that many people never understand, until it is too late, is that the more you try to avoid suffering the more you suffer because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you in proportion to your fear of being hurt.” – Thomas Merton Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) offers many useful approaches to…
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How to Find Balance Between Change & Acceptance
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” – Carl Rogers Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) rests upon the idea of balancing and comparing two seemingly oppositional things. This is at the heart of the word dialectic. Dr. Marsha Linehan, creator of DBT, explains that dialectics is…
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Are You an Effective Communicator?
“Talking is like playing the harp; there is as much in laying the hands on the strings to stop their vibration as in twanging them to bring out their music.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes Conflict happens in relationships. As with most things, interpersonal conflict exists on a continuum from very mild to very severe. When…
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Negotiate Effectively: Classic Compromise Solutions
“Better bend than break.” – Scottish proverb In yesterday’s post, we learned how to use the dialectical behavior therapy tool of R-A-V-E-N to prepare ourselves for effective negotiation. When we are in a situation involving conflict or even mild disagreement, it is important that we feel confident in our ability to compromise. When we compromise,…
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Identify 8 Obstacles to Interpersonal Effectiveness
“Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.” – William James No matter how skilled we are in navigating our social worlds, obstacles or blocks to interpersonal effectiveness are bound to arise from time to time. When…
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Opposite Action Transforms Powerful Emotions
“There can be no transforming of darkness into light and of apathy into movement without emotion.” – Carl Gustav Jung Emotions color our experience of life with a diverse nuanced range of expression. We are capable of feeling the heights of excitement, love, and pride, as well as the deep lows of sadness, anger, and…
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Identify 6 Key Interpersonal Skills
“Man is a knot into which relationships are tied.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry Relationships are inextricably linked to human life. We depend on one another for connection, meaning, and a sense of purpose. While developing one’s core sense of identity and self-sufficiency are invaluable to our development into strong dynamic adults, we are not separate…
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Using “D-E-A-R M-A-N” to Get What You Want
What on earth is D-E-A-R M-A-N and how is it supposed to help you get what you want in relationships? Good question. This mnemonic device was developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan as a component of Dialectical Behavior Therapy to help remind people of the basic skills involved in getting what you want in relationships in…
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4 Relationship Myths
In a healthy relationship, we are able to ask for what we need without a paralyzing fear of conflict or of the potential reaction of the other person. This is far easier said than done. It can be scary to assert ourselves in a relationship, exposing our authentic vulnerable selves to another human being. While…
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Top 10 Ways to Regulate Emotions – Part Two
Ready to learn about five more strategies of emotion regulation? As mentioned in Top 10 Ways to Regulate Emotions – Part One, strategies six and seven are specifically endorsed by Dr. Marsha Linehan, creator of Dialectical Behavior Therapy. The following emotion regulation strategies are adapted from The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook (McKay, Wood, &…
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